family photo

One of the reasons I enjoy this season so much is that I can convince Tim go get family photos done.... I just received this photo about 5 minutes ago and I am excited to examine the rest. Thank you Kimberlee for our awesome photos.

Forgotten Password

Last year in February my 11 year old laptop crashed and I was unable to retrieve anything from it. In May the email address that I had associated with my blogger account was closed because I was no longer attending school. For a year I had no way to get into my blog but finally after jumping through a couple of loops I can use it again. Woot woot. LeahA

Sophia's Birth Story

Sophia was due on January 29th 2013, the 12 days that passed that date sucked.  I was certain that I would deliver my baby early because:  I was on my feet all day at work, I walked my dog every day up a steep hill, I ate spicy pinapples, I drank raspberry leaf tea and was religiously going to the gym (which I was told would make for an easier labour) well I was very wrong.     Sophia came one day before my midwives were going to intervene, I did not want that to happen and thankfully on the morning of February 11th I felt something strange a brewin inside of me.                                                                     
I woke up at 3am feeling uneasy and decided to get in the shower to relax but the shower and I did not agree. Instead I paced my living room for 2 hours until my husbands alarm went off. As soon as he woke up I told him that I thought he should stay home because today might be the day! He freaked out and started asking me a bunch of questions about timing contractions but I just gave him the stink eye since I wasn't in a chatty mood.  After he drank coffee and woke up he thought we should call our midwife to let her know whats up, she asked to just listen to me and agreed I should come in as soon as I could leave. After a very uncomfortable 30 min car drive we got to the birthing facility where my doula/great friend Jill and one of my midwives were waiting for me, they immediately started doing what they do and said it was a good thing I arrived when I did because I was already 7cm dilated.
After I got in more comfy attire, I stepped into the warm birthing tub and Tim turned on some music so that I could be as comfortable as possible while in labour.  I was well taken care of by my doula and a couple studentmidwives but a couples hours after my water broke and when I was fully dialated I was not progressing fast enough. We tried all sorts of moves and positions to get baby to come out but she would not budge and I was becoming very eexhausted.  I was at the birth centre for about 11 hours when everyone thought it would be a good idea to transfer me to the hospital. The drive to my hospital took about 20 minutes, the WORST 20 minutes of my life, probably for my hunny too. Sitting in one position was awful for my back ,at the hospital I was made to sit in that same position in the bed the whole time too. The 2nd worst (60) mins of my life were in the hospital room attached to every kind of machine possible not able to sway or walk or stretch. When a woman is in labour she should be able to move !  When the Dr arrived she did an ultra sound and saw that the baby was upside down with her head cocked to the right.  The Dr said she would take me on as a patient if I got an epidural and agreed to a forcept delivery (salad tongs).  Since I basically had no other choice they called the anesthesiologist in and he gave me the epidural but it didn't work so he tried again but still no luck after the third time and only numb legs to show for all his work the Dr came back in with my last option. The Dr told me that I would have to get a spinal tap which would basically  make me  completely numb, in order to do the spinal we would have to be moved to the Operating Room so everyone washed their hands and got suited up and away we went.  As I entered the room the Dr told us that if the forcepts didn't work then we were already prepared to do a c-section, my heart sunk as my dream of having a drug free water birth slipped farther and farther away. The OR was cold and sterile and I didn't recognize anyone besides my pale faced husband who was not doing well with all the needles I was being pokedwith.  The Dr gave me three tries to get the baby out with no luck so my midwife asked that I get one more try and she whispered something in my ear about how strong I am and how my body could do it.  It worked because at 1018pm baby girl Hansen showed up and was immediately placed on my chest but to be honest I don't remember that moment, I just remember my midwife kissing my forehead and congratulating my Husband and I.  I held my baby as my body was put back together and spent then next couple days in the hospital recovering.  It took me a while to come to terms with our birth experience but the nurses at the hospital took excellent care of us and all of my work friends supplied us with delicious meals.  It took my body about a month before I could stand up without cringing and 10 months before I would sleep more then 3hours at a time but Sophia has been more then worth it.

SGH

My Joy.

Being Pregnant

When I was young I never imagined myself married or with children, I never played pretend with my dolls because I didn't like dolls. Actually I was terrified of them because someone thought it was appropriate to let a young child (me) watch a movie about a demon doll and to this day when I see a doll I don't think happy thoughts. When I was young I would read books about imaginary worlds and would watch TV shows about superheros, I lived in my created worlds to deal with a traumatic childhood, it was my coping mechanism and for the most part it worked. I think my imagination kept me away from drugs and alcohol , I also think that the Grace of God kept me safe from things and people that I would not be able to defend myself from. All that to say I didn't have my life mapped out around getting married or having children. When I did eventually meet the man I would marry we didn't know if we would have kids together. Well in October of 2011 my husband told one of his friends that he thinks he is ready to have more kids but he was unsure how to tell me, fast forward 2 months and we are driving home from church and Tim just blurts it out. He tells me that while our pastor was preaching the Christmas story he felt a nudge in his heart to tell me as soon as possible. I was FREAKED OUT. A baby. In me. Pregnant. I would have to be a mom, I don't know how to be a mom. My thoughts went crazy, I struggled to agree that this was the right thing for us, part of me wanted it and the other part was terrified. Early in 2012 we became pregnant. Tim and I were both excited, so much so that he told all of his buddies, I am more reserved when sharing big news so I just kept it in my close circle. Well on March 2nd we miscarried and I was kind of a mess. I didn't realize it would hit me so hard to be unpregnant especially when I was scared of being pregnant. It was hard to tell people the news because I felt like I had to console them and I really didn't want to. After I miscarried I started researching it and found out that it is very common, so much so that some women miscarry and don't even know it. Two months later we were pregnant again but this time I did not tell anyone, not even my husband until I felt I was out of the danger zone of miscarrying. My pregnancy was great. I had no weird cravings, no crazy mood swings, no feet swellings, no high blood pressure and I worked almost all the way until the end of my pregnancy much to the dismay of everyone around me but I hate sitting still and get bored quickly if I don't have a task at hand. My baby was due January 29th and I believe that is where part of her birth story should begin (even though she decided to stay in a lot longer) next post. Leaha

Baby On The Way

I still cant believe I am pregnant and that this new member of our family will be here in 8 weeks! It does not feel real yet. I am extremely excited about our new arrival but at my last appointment with my Midwife I was reminded that I wont have any family around to help/comfort/show me the way, so to speak. It will just be me and my hunny (and the Midwife) at the birth and although I know I will be fine, I do wish my Mom and siblings lived just a little bit closer so they could be here with us. I am so very grateful for this pregnancy and what it will bring even if it has to come with some pain I know it will be worth it.

love

I
love
my
Husband

Herb Roasted Beef with Potatoes and Carrots

Tonight I am going to try my hand at roasting a rump, this recipe seemed like the easiest one to start off with. It comes from Jessica Seinfield's Double Delicious book and website which is linked below :)
Hopefully Tim and Ava both enjoy it.

Herb Roasted Beef with Potatoes and Carrots : Recipes : do it Delicious

Head Ache

Today is the first day back to class for my (almost) last semester, I only have one other class to finish when I am done this term and then I will finally be a graduate of SFU with a major in Criminology and a Minor in First Nations Studies…HOORAY! This has been a long time coming since I have never been the typical student and I moved to another country and got married half way through my studies (I definitely don’t recommend doing it that way but in the end it has all worked out for the good).
Today was not how I wanted to start my first day back; my plan was to wake up with Tim and go to the gym before getting ready for the road trip north to school, but my plans were thwarted ! Last night while Tim and I were playing our much loved game of Dominoes a domino found its way smack dab on the bridge of my nose and believe me it hit HARD! So much so that my eyes got all teary, I received a raging headache instantaneous and pimple looking thing appeared on my nose, the annoying thing is I did it to myself because I was protecting my dominoes from Tim (I thought he was trying to get a peek). Well that raging headache turned into a raging migraine that kept me awake through the night and kept me sensitive to light, sound, motion and made me feel dizzy up until about 10 minutes ago (My sweet mother gave me something to dull the pain). So there was no gym, there was no morning coffee with Tim and there were no happy feelings towards driving to Canada, just sleepy, hurting, grumpy, decaffeinated me.
Here is to hoping for a smoother next Monday.

Lappy

A couple of months ago my laptop decided to not work for no real reason so I have been using my Hunnys huge desktop to do all my schoolwork and waste time on facebook. Well 2 days ago I decided to do something about my broken laptop and bring it to a repair shop in town, but before I did that I tried one more time to turn the old thing on and it worked as if nothing ever happened which got me really excited.

I know this isn't a very big deal but it is to me because: I dont like sharing a computer with Tim because, well, we both wanna be on at the same time and that creates conflict, I like being able to bring my laptop with me to school and I have all my music and photos on it.

So today I am thankful that my aging orange laptop is back on my lap !

Booooo

I felt like I tried really hard this semester at school but my marks dont show it like I thought they would, so its sad face time :(

I guess cooking, cleaning, looking after sassy sally pants and her Daddy all while working almost full-time at the Bucks doesnt partner well with a full course load at school.

Better luck next year?

Reading

FINALS ARE OVER.
Now I can relax, and blog

And Read books that I want to read.

The first one on my list is a book that I have never read before but that I have thought about reading for the last 10 years or so and that is the
Chronicles of Narnia, I love the movies and hopefully will enjoy the novels too.

I cant wait until this evening, post gym when my Timmy is playing his video game so that I can open up the first page !

sick

The icky ick ick bug hit me.

Of coarse it hit right when I have 3 essays due this week.

Here is to hoping that Nyquil and Buckleys do their job for the next couple of days so that my Professors do not receive jumbled up words compiled into incoherent sentences making up 13 pages of semi intelligent thoughts.

Friend

Last night I went out with my friend Michelle, we hadn’t seen each other on a one-on-one basis for a long time so it was a much needed gathering. Eating dinner and chatting with her reminded me how much I cherish that friendship. She knows and understands me and isn’t afraid to ask the tough questions about my life and she is also a great encouragement for me to pursue my OWN relationship with God, something that I have been neglecting lately.
One of the major highlights of my week is getting to come back to Canada and seeing the people that I love and miss but sometimes that leaves me with a ungrateful feeling about what I lack in life because they are not with my in the states. I have a great life and shouldn’t have a negative spirit about what I don’t have but like a child having a tantrum “I just want them there with me!!!!!” Like I told Michelle last night, the hardest transition for me in getting Married was not my husband leaving the toilet seat up but not having the regular deep friendship type friends around me for whenever I needed or pleased. Thankfully because of prayers from such friends I am starting to build those solid relationships with the people God has put in my life, so gradually this spirit of ungratefulness is changing into one of thankfulness and delight that I get to have great friends on both sides of the border.

Wifeness

I love my Hunny dearly, he is sweet, creative, funny and a rad bass player but I really think that I would have benefited from some sort of "wife school" where they could have taught me how to communicate in man language (and basic cooking too)unfortunately i don't think that type of thing exists so I will have to rely on God, Married Peoples Advice,Grace and a Couple more years of semi alright meals. Thank goodness Tim graceful when it comes to my learning curve and also not a picky eater and Ava is young enough that she will hopefully not remember the weird habits I have.

Pizza Dinner

While at work yesterday I was thinking about what to make for dinner that night which is often a struggle for me since no one taught me how to cook , I am not that good at it yet and most nights I am too tired to even want to be awake let alone do anything that requires a brain. Well I knew I needed to get over those thoughts and plan a dinner, so in-between making a decaf tall ristretto soy no whip extra hot gingerbread latter (not a joke) and a American misto the brilliant idea of making a pizza was born, I went to the store and bought all the ingredients but on my way to pick Ava up from school I thought it would be much more enjoyable for all of us if we got to do it as a family and if we would get to make our own mini pizzas, so I went back to the store and bought the 6inch pizza dough dough’s and then went home and did all the pre production.






It was a really fun activity to do together and I could tell that the usually sassy Ava enjoyed it because she didn't complain once and was all smiles. I want to try and include her more often in cooking dinner but I am in need of some kid friendly recipes, so if you have one please share :)

Two Years ago

All of my most favourite people, including the one who was taking the photo too :)

Sister

I feel super blessed for being born into a big family, I am the oldest of 5 and in these last 6 years I have definitely grown closer to my younger siblings, especially my only sister Jesse.

Last night after a long and physically exhausting day at school(we did some cedar woodcarving) I went to my parents house to unwind. I have been feeling the need to be more involved in my sisters life lately because it seems like she has all of a sudden grown up without me realizing it and i don't want to miss anything more with her since i missed so much when she was little. Well my sister wasn't at my parents place so after numerous texts and pleading she finally came home to hang out with me. My sister is so sweet natured and caring even though she has had a much more difficult life then me and is often lost in the mix with three teenage brothers at home. So We decided to watch the first Harry Potter together ( she was very surprised and flustered that i have never read/seen Harry Potter before) and while we were watching it she noticed that i was in pain/uncomfortable from carving that she volunteered herself to massage my back... for the whole movie !!!! I don't think anyone has ever done that for me and/or done it so happily.My Jesse is loving and thoughtful and treats me so well that I am glad that I get to call my sister. The Point is, I love my little sister and am excited to get to know her more as she grows into young adulthood.

Rush Hour

Since I live in America with my husband and step daughter and am also finishing my degree at SFU I spend two days a week in Burnaby with my family so that I can go to school on Tuesdays and Wednesdays. On Tuesday mornings I usually wake up around 4:45am to be able to get on the road by 530am to make it to class on time. Well today I was exceptionally fast and was out the door 10 minutes earlier than expected and was excited because I was in Canada by 6:20am ( doesn’t seem like much to be excited for until you realize that every moment counts in rush hour traffic when you are trying to get from Surrey to SFU). I was happily driving along until I saw a sea of red brake lights on HWY 99, GAHHH I thought to myself, why today when I was ahead of schedule? Well I was pretty frustrated about the situations, there was an accident and it was slowing me down! Stupid drivers I thought! As I drove by the motorcyclist that was hit and still lying on the road, my thoughts quickly changed to those of shock, sadness and thankfulness that it wasn’t me or that I hadn’t hit another person with my car. I drove pass this motorist soon after the accident happened and it probably took me about 30 minutes to go 1000 meters but as I was listening to radio reports traffic only got worse in that area, I wondered to myself that had I left at my normal time my time stuck in grid lock would have been exceptionally worse. Once I finally cleared the area and was over the bridge I realized that it was pretty foolish of me to be annoyed over a 30 minute inconvenience when God so clearly has everything in his hands. I wasn’t lying there on the pavement and I wasn’t late for school yet my selfish nature told me to be angry and annoyed that I would be disrupted on my drive. As I drove into my schools parking lot, early enough to get a spot at a reduced rate I was glad that I was given a gentle reminder about my attitude and perception over situations that are out of my control. I am grateful to know the GOD who loves me enough to set me straight, even on the little things.

God

He guides ME


in paths of righteousness


for HIS name's sake.


Psalm 23b.